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Tuesday, March 1, 2011

Working on the Land Rover.

SNOW DAY!  Finally, after two big blizzards in the last three days today was declared a snow day. After a pot of coffee this morning The Canadian and I made a list of possible activities to do for the day. The list consisted of fun things like skiing, snow shoeing, decorating our newly furnished bedroom, fixing the sink and organizing the basement. Fun, right? Personally, I voted for watching a Kardashian marathon even though it didn't make the list. The Canadian voted for an Ice Road Truckers marathon. I don't know why we bothered with a list, we didn't end up doing any of these super entertaining and fun activities. Instead, we worked on his truck. 

Here's why we should have stuck to the list:



1. If you suggest/volunteer to work on your husband's truck ON A SNOW DAY when you should be cuddled up in front of the fire drinking (Bailey's and) hot chocolate...you better mean it. Because if not you'll be forced to back up your offer and work in the snow with tools you can't name and engine parts that you don't care about.




2. Ummm, I suddenly feel like we live in the backhills of Tennessee with a mutt, a trailer and a riding lawn mower. And drink Budweiser in cans.

(Note: Please ignore his sweater.)




3. Try to keep your head out from under the hood as there is only a precariously placed wooden stick holding up the 100 pound hood.




4. Weird, gross liquid is not supposed to leak from that thing-a-ma-doo-dad. I don't know what it's called and NO, I don't care. Please refer back to #2.




5. Steer clear of the blue bottle. It contains smellsgrossnastyewww oil that smells like a small animal curled up and died...years ago.




6. When your husband is lying in the snow under his truck and yells 'wrench' he doesn't always appreciate it when you yell back '10 blade' or 'scalpel' and pretend you're the star of Grey's Anatomy.




7. If you get down at the right level you can get a photo of your husband appearing to be run over by his own truck. I would've gotten down on that level but it was all snowy.




8. I get bored working on The Canadian's truck so I decided to do a little winter gardening. Not bad for 44 seconds worth of work.




9. This is the passenger side of the Land Rover. Look closely. What's missing? I'll give you a hint - it is often ripped off when backing out of the garage (not in this case though, it just doesn't exist).




10. I'm telling you, the stank of that grease (from the blue bottle) is permanently embedded in the back of my nose. I could work at a morgue and the inside of my nose would smell better. It's following me. I can't get away from it and am scared that I'll still be smelling it when the snow melts in another two months.



On a completely unrelated, yet hilarious, note: Tonight we went out to dinner (as my reward for helping today) and were forced to park in private parking lot - you know the kind where you get a ticket and the little arm thing goes up to let you in and out of the lot? After we parked we had to walk back through the parking lot. We walked out the exit lane at the same time a truck was leaving. As we followed The Canadian suddenly (nonchalantly) said, "Look out." I looked at him funny, not understanding, and immediately got bopped in the head by the arm-thingy. It came down on my head!

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